Buy a jumbo jet and then bury all your clothes. Paint your left knee green then extract your weekend.

If Google were a guy (thanks, D):

Unretouched Disney princesses.

Marvel’s worst comics.

Fake masturbation warning letters (thanks, B).

Documentary about In The Mood For Love’s cinematographer:

Scorsese:

More funny Amazon reviews (thanks, D).

A brief history of sampling:

Can someone fix the red-eye in my pic? (Thanks, B.)

What the fuck is my Twitter bio?